Castigliones, The Book of the Courtier, is a handbook for the Courtiers, during the 16th Century. Just like today we have several life handbooks available for our everyday lives in the 21st century. I will attempt to link the civilizing process and the Book of the Courtier, with Iyanla Vanzant’s, Until Today! This book is a great tool for changing and shaping your life. Until Today!, is daily devotions for spiritual growth and peace of mind. Just as Book of the Courtier, was a guide during the Middle Ages, Vanzant's, Until Today!, serves as a guide to get people to focus more on the inward man today. By doing this we will be able to focus on the inward man our outward appearances as well as the well being of others. The civilizing process is a term that defines the process by which social classes broke down or tried to define new barriers, as Vanzant wants to define and build up new barriers for people as a whole
This book is a guide to help you overcome situations, circumstances or relationships in your life that you have been struggling to overcome, trying to work through, or doing your best to work around. "If you believe that life has to be hard, that things will probably never get better for you, that you must except less because that is just the way life is, raise you hands and shout into the ether, Until Today!". This is a part of Vanzants theme for the book. She has developed a life handbook that if you can follow it for one full year it will seriously improve your life and life situations.
Iyanla tries to point out that whatever has been going on in your mind, your life, or your heart can stop - right now, if that is truly what you desire. We have to be willing to make the change though. You have to be acceptable to doing a “new thing”. This book is a 365-day book, and you have to be willing to spend a little time each day in devotion to the truth about yourself and the truth about life. Devotion as Vanzant defines as “conscious recollection” or a divine action can clear up misunderstandings that may have blurred your vision of life, Until Today, until you pick up the book and make a commitment to change. Your devotion as a demonstration of your willingness to embrace new concepts and to undertake behaviors that support those concepts, will ultimately result in your happiness and the happiness of others. "When you are actively, willingly and devoted to seeking a 'good thing,' the Divine Intelligence of life will guide, support and reward you."
During the civilizing process, in the middle ages when people became increasingly concerned with the self and the fashioning of the self. The Book of the Courtier, is in a form a handbook for the courtiers. The information in this book is a form of education and self -fashioning for the courtier. The courtier must learn the proper skills of war, he must also learn how to love. People started to focus more on beauty, the outward man , and not the inner man so much. The civilizing process and the demand for attention to self facilitated this.
Just as the Courtier guide as a sonnet gets the courtier to be constantly thinking that he should be doing something. One needs to show self-control over body and desires, if they couldn’t do this they would not be successful spiritually or socially. Well Vanzant, wants her readers to be thinking of ways to improve themselves socially and spiritually so that they can be successful in life. In relation to the civilizing process through a form of humanism, Until Today!, focuses on returning to religion to study and improve oneself. She seeks to help one study to improve himself as an individual. She tries to do this by returning to religion. Although she used scriptures from the Bible, her daily devotions are universal. She refers to God most often as a Supreme Being. However she focuses on the fact that there is a superior being, who is there to guide, protect and bless us if we are willing to do the work and put in the time to be blessed and changed. She believes in having a relationship with the one on high in order to get close spiritually with him.
During the Middle Ages, just as it is today, people are more involved, concerned or demanding more attention for themselves we are not looking out for the people of the community or the community as a whole. As people finances are increasing, they are demanding and wanting more. We are not as considerate and courteous to others even from when I was a child. We need to come back down as a whole and take a look at our inner man.
It is suggested that you read the daily message each morning before your day begins. By doing this you will have the opportunity to incorporate the principle being covered into your own life experience. Don’t agree or disagree with any particular statement. Seek a deeper understanding by exploring your thoughts and feelings. She encourages you to develop the habit of writing the daily affirmation and carrying it with you. It can be posted in your car, home, and office, even at your desk at work. When the daily devotion is read or recited daily, it reinforces the principle in your own consciousness. The daily devotions are a format or process offered as a guide to a deeper understanding of spiritual principles that foster spiritual growth and peace of mind. In her introduction to Until Today!, Iyanla says that, "the journey into self-acceptance and self-love must begin with self-examination.... Until you take the journey of self-reflection, it is almost impossible to grow or learn in life."
This guide will help you grow, if you are willing to grow. You will grow from struggling to searching. From trying to do to learning how to do. You will grow from fear to having faith, to demonstrating your courage. You will grow in many ways. Growth can be a very uplifting experience. It can be beautiful and ugly, empowering and confining, thought provoking and mind-boggling, pleasant and unpleasant, all at the same time. "Just when you think you've got it, life seems to say, "Well, now take this!" And you do. Then, the minute you are ready to throw your hands up, give up or beat up on yourself for doing the same thing in the same way and ending up in the same place again, you realize you haven't done so badly after all."
In today’s society, images of the "perfect" person constantly thrust upon us. Many young men and women put an unnecessary amount of pressure to try to achieve this perfect person, when all that is needed is to become a good person on the inside. Just as Iyanla, Castiglione engaged in a similar analysis of the qualities of a courtier to formulate his conception of an ideal/ perfect person in his book. Castiglione listed within these books the qualities of the perfect Courtier. There are many similarities between the qualities of Castiglione’s perfect Courtier and the qualities Iyanal focuses on for one to improve themselves as a person, specifically those pertaining to physical appearance (not vain beauty but keeping oneself looking nice), intelligence, and sociability. The work is separated into four books intended to represent four consecutive nights(Young 75). Each book addresses a separate subject, but is united in its attempt to describe the ideal Courtier(Young 75). While the book was welcomed with enthusiasm by many people, it was not so well accepted by others(Burke 99). Some people question the basis for Castiglione wrighting the book(Burke 99), similar to the way many question the ideal portrayals of the sexes on magazines, television, and radio . Although the book was intended to depict the perfect Courtier, many of the qualities Castiglione desires for his Courtier are also desired for the male and female mate.
The Courtier presents a dialogue between nineteen men and four women, all of whom are authentic, well-known humanists of the period(Young 75). The work is composed of four books corresponding to four acts of a play, four consecutive evenings during which the court discusses the qualities of the perfect Courtier(Buke 25). Book One and Book Three contain all of the traits desired in a courtier and a lady of the court. The first book discusses the essential qualities and attainments of a courtier(Young 75). Many of the qualities that the ideal Courtier is required to have are related to qualities a female desires in her mate. Three of the most important qualities that a woman desires in her mate that are also desired for Castiglione’s Courtier are grace, beauty, and intelligence.
"If I do well beare in mind, me thynke (Count Lewis) you have this night oftentimes repeted, that the Courtier ought to accompany all his doinges, gestures, demeaners, finally al his mocions with a grace, and this, me think, ye put for a sauce to every thing, without the which all his other properties and good condicions were litle woorth"(Hoby 56).
One may question what Castiglione’s idea of grace is that makes it so important to his Courtier. He explains grace later in the text as avoiding being something your not
(artificial) and acting in a casual, natural manner done without thought(Woodhouse 2). Castiglione also says that grace can be taught to the Courtier if it is taught at an early age(Hoby 58). As the quote states above, Castiglione feels that if the Courtier does not have a certain grace about him, that all his other good characteristics will be useless. It is important for the Courtier to always appear that he has a certain knowledge of an exercise or task and to never look baffled by anything presented to him(Woodhouse 76). The Courtier must have this "calm self-confidence" in every aspect of his life(Burke 31).
Grace is also an important quality that women look for in an ideal mate. Girls often state that they want a man that will "just act himself." However, there must be a certain confidence conveyed in the man’s actions. If a male is talking to a girl, and decides to ask for her phone number, he has to do it in a suave, casual manner, otherwise, he will probably not get the number or get a fake number. Girls sense when a man is uncomfortable talking to them, and while a female might think it is cute that a man is stuttering or has a red face while talking to her, it is not a quality she wants to see in an ideal mate.
"…oure Courtyer oughte of nature to have a faire comelynesse of fisnamye and person…(Hoby 51).
An attractive physical appearance is another characteristic that Castiglione feels the Courtier should have(Hoby 51). He specifically mentions the Courtier’s size and stated that he should be neither too large nor too small(Woodhouse 75). The Count, one of the men threshing over the physical traits of the perfect Courtier, states that it is better for the Courtier to be smaller of size than larger of size(Hoby 52). For if he is larger in size, people will gawk at him as if he is a "monstrous" thing(Hoby 52). Another man in the discussion, Bibbiena, even questions his own physical imperfections for being a courtier. He states that he has a pleasing face, yet questions the shape of his body, as he is a bit overweight and his legs are far from perfect(Hoby 51). Bibbiena continues by rebuking those courtiers who are too vain(Woodhouse 75) and those "that do not onely courle the hear, and picke the browes , but also paumpre themselves in every point like the most wanton and dishonest women in the worlde …"(Hoby 52).
Similar to the Courtier, physical attributes are important in determining the ideal male mate. Girls desire a man who is, in their opinion, of a good size, not too large or to small. Hence, we have come to the reason why I lost over one hundred pounds. I was aware that my body shape was far from the female’s ideal image of a male body. Never did I see overweight, shirtless models in magazine and television ads. These media outlets realize that girls desire to see men with chiseled, sculpted bodies and that is what they cater to. Therefore, I did the only thing I could do to come closer to that ideal, I lost weight to a size that was neither too large nor too small. While body shape is an important physical characteristic for determining the ideal male mate, the man must have a handsome face or he will not fit that physical ideal women have. Unfortunately, unlike the quality of grace, good looks can not be learned at an early age. One must simply play the cards that Fate has dealt him to the best of his ability. However, girls do not want a "high maintenance guy." This man is similar to the man that Bibbiena described in his day for the courtier, but to put it in modern terms: women do not want a man who will spend more time in the bathroom then themselves. If a man is too conscious of his looks, it is a turn off for women and not a quality they would chose for their ideal mate.
"…for as the minde is much more worthye then the bodye, so deserveth it also to bee better decked and polished"(Hoby 81).
Castiglione places a heavy emphasis on the sharpness of the Courtier’s mind and his education. One of the men contributing to the discussion about the Courtier’s education, Canossa, comments on the barbarity of France, who consider those who study literature inferior(Woodhouse 86). He states that it is important for the Courtier to have knowledge of both the Greek and Latin tongue, because of all the wonderful works written in this language(Hoby 84-85). Knowledge of these languages will allow him to know more about history and to judge the works of other poets better(Hoby 85), keeping his mind off of women(Young 88) and the pleasant entertainment they provide(Hoby 85).
Intelligence is also an important trait in an ideal boyfriend. Women want a man of intelligence for two reasons: to have someone they can have an articulate conversation with and because most men with sharp minds make money. Women desire mates that they can have an educated conversation with and who can present themselves as being intellectually competent when they are in social settings. Yet, the other key benefit of a sharp mind is those in possession of it, usually have the better paying jobs in comparison with those who lack it. Hence, intelligent men will have more money to spend on their significant other.
The third book of The Courtier "fashions an ideal court lady whose function is to refine and complement her male counterpart"(Young 75). Some of the qualities expected of the Courtier are also expected of the ideal court lady, such as a fair knowledge of literature and a graceful manner(Burke 28). Many qualities that Castiglione desires for the ideal court lady, men desire for their ideal mate, such as beauty, modesty, and charisma."
"Me thinke well beawty is more necessarie in her then in the Courtier…"(Hoby 216).
Giuliano, one of the men partaking in the discussion on beauty for the court lady, makes a point to say that the court lady will have to be every bit as feminine as the Courtier is masculine(Woodhouse 118). She also must be more what a man is looking for in an ideal woman. Women today recognize the huge emphasis placed on their looks by men. This is why so many women spend money on cosmetic surgery to try to enhance their image. This is also why many younger girls struggle with eating disorders such as bulimia and anorexia. Girls want to achieve that image of a perfect woman, which in many men’s opinions is thin. But, as there is a mean between being too large and too small in respect to the ideal man, women should realize that there is also a mean for women’s sizes and remember in some men’s opinions, thinner is not always better.
"Therefore whan she commeth to daunse, or to show any kinde of musike, she ought to be brought to it with suffringe her self somewhat to be prayed, and with a certain bashfulnes, that may declare the noble shamefastnes that is contrarye to headinesse"(Hoby 220).
Castiglione thought that the lady of the court should carry herself with a certain degree of humbleness, so no one could accuse her of being snobbish(Hoby 218). The lady of the should be displayed in the clothes that a lady of the court wears (Hoby 220). Castiglione informs the reader that an ideal woman of the court should be aware of the activities and the company she will be in and dress accordingly(Hoby 220).
Modesty is another important quality in an ideal female mate. While it is important for a girl to be attractive, a man does not want a girl to be stuck up about her good looks. This presents a problem for many of today’s attractive girls. Good-looking girls are usually cognizant of their beauty and wear clothes that would make Castiglione shutter in his grave. Most men find women more attractive when they act in a way that makes one think that they are totally unaware of their beauty. This sense of modesty is a key when formulating the ideal female mate.
Castiglione’s portrayal of an ideal in The Courtier was controversial. Some critics, such as Walter Raleigh, felt that the author’s use of an ideal as the theme in his book was reflective of the age in which it was written- the Renaissance(Young 82). Other critics felt it was pointless to write about someone as perfect and unattainable as the Courtier(Young 77). Castiglione indirectly responds to the critics who felt this way by saying they should also inform renown writers such as Plato, Xenophone, and Marcus Tullius and inform them that their work was done in vain too when they portrayed their idea of the perfect Republic, the perfect King, and the perfect Orator, respectively.
Today, the images of ideals that are constantly displayed to us, whether on television, magazines, or radio, are coming under much more fire as young people are putting an unnecessary amount of pressure to try to achieve them. Sculpted bodies are showed to us on television and loving acts that would make Mother Terrisa jealous are sung about loved ones on the radio. I agree with Castiglione’s critics, by having plastic surgery or losing one hundred pounds, it is still not possible for one to become an ideal mate, because it is just that, an ideal. But why not improve on a quality and come one step closer to achieving the impossible?
"I say that for her that liveth in Court, me thinke there beelongeth unto her above all other things, a certein sweetnesse in language that may delite, whereby she may gentlie entertein all kinde of men with talke woorth the hearynge…"(Hoby 217).
Giuliano continues his discussion about the attributes of the woman of the court by stating that she should be sociable, but not to the point of being a fake(Hoby 217). A certain sweetness should be displayed in her social behavior according to Giuliano(Hoby 217). He continues by saying the lady of the court should have a sharp wit, which would make her anything but dull(Hoby 217). She can also not be afraid to discuss controversial matter, as then she might be accused of being a prude, or worse, guilty of the very matter in discussion(Hoby 217).
An ideal female mate must have a charismatic personality. A male wants to be able to carry on a conversation with a female that goes both ways; he talks to her and she talks to him. There are not many things worse than when a man meets a girl and talks to her, and it is as if he is pulling teeth; there is absolutely no response. A man also does not want his mate to act fake in her social activities; she should never try to be something she is not. Similar to Castiglione’s view on the ideal court lady’s social behavior, a man also is left wondering when the conversation with a woman has progressed, and a controversial subject such as drug use comes up, and the woman says nothing. The initial response that comes into one’s mind, as Castiglione’s, is that she has partaken in the activity.
Castiglione’s portrayal of an ideal in The Courtier was controversial. Some critics, such as Walter Raleigh, felt that the author’s use of an ideal as the theme in his book was reflective of the age in which it was written- the Renaissance(Young 82). Other critics felt it was pointless to write about someone as perfect and unattainable as the Courtier(Young 77). Castiglione indirectly responds to the critics who felt this way by saying they should also inform renown writers such as Plato, Xenophone, and Marcus Tullius and inform them that their work was done in vain too when they portrayed their idea of the perfect Republic, the perfect King, and the perfect Orator, respectively.
Today, the images of ideals that are constantly displayed to us, whether on television, magazines, or radio, are coming under much more fire as young people are putting an unnecessary amount of pressure to try to achieve them. Sculpted bodies are showed to us on television and loving acts that would make Mother Terrisa jealous are sung about loved ones on the radio. I agree with Castiglione’s critics, by having plastic surgery or losing one hundred pounds, it is still not possible for one to become an ideal mate, because it is just that, an ideal. But why not improve on a quality and come one step closer to achieving the impossible?

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